2021.12.09 09:45 SheevPalp07 Deluxe next week with the songs from the doc? 🤔
Sounds plausible because A LOT of the songs from the doc aren’t on it, and it’s only 17 songs so that gives room for a deluxe that wouldn’t make the album too long.
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2021.12.09 09:45 PM_ME_SSTEAM_KEYS haha yes
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2021.12.09 09:45 mkaku- My wife says I run like a T-rex... how do I fix that? I'm in box 3.
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2021.12.09 09:45 AutoNewspaperAdmin [Video] - National weather forecast for December 9 | FOX
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2021.12.09 09:45 Guywith3wives Nafrat mat pehlao....bas yehi kahna h
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2021.12.09 09:45 enricupcake Charla Winfrey sits down for an hour long conversation with Travis Scott about the Astroworld tragedy
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2021.12.09 09:45 RageshAntony What if you lived in a fully transparent glass House of 100K Sq.ft , shared by multiple joint familes?
2021.12.09 09:45 soubitos Simple powerbank style 5V1.5A DC UPS with 18650 https://oshwlab.com/catech75/arduinouno-dc-ups_copy_copy
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2021.12.09 09:45 Alternative_Link he’s wearing the flat cap :( dare i say more
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2021.12.09 09:45 wrathyie respect gatotkaca #mobilelegends #tankbuild #mlbbtiktok
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2021.12.09 09:45 AutoNewspaperAdmin [Video] - Instagram CEO faces questioning on social media platform's danger to young users | FOX
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2021.12.09 09:45 Prestigious_Buyer722 Link in Comments
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2021.12.09 09:45 HindMohamed May your honor be long, O homeland of peace 🕊️
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2021.12.09 09:45 anaila01 Mermaid 🧜♀️ NFT GIVEAWAY for next 12 hours 🚀🌙 Join TG To Get A Free RARE NFT
The Mermaid Token was founded to be the number 1 BTC reward token on the Binance smart chain. At the present time there is no token that has achieved as much as Mermaid.
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Things to come
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I am sure you have seen our name... join us in our telegram if you have any questions. There is no doubt that even a small percentage of Mermaid in your crypto portfolio will add a lot of long term value.
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2021.12.09 09:45 materialperfection Angel of the morning
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2021.12.09 09:45 WalletInvestor We welcome Ajeverse to WalletInvestor.com where we feature market data and forecasts
Upon request from community members we added Ajeverse to our website where we feature coin statistics, market capitalization, coin investment ratings and Machine Learning based forecasts. We wish the best in the future!
(forecasts and additional information will be present soon as we gather data)
submitted by WalletInvestor to Ajeverse [link] [comments]
2021.12.09 09:45 Beautiful-Horse192 Venting and ranting. I need someone to help me figure things out.
(This has been going on in my notes app for a few days, and I just need to share it now. I need some answers. I’ve been ranting, venting, documenting, listing, I just need some people to read the entire thing. Some might be nonsensical, some might be gross or weird, but I need someone to talk to me about this. I’m done just holding it in my head.)
Symptoms/rant. SOME ARE REAL POSSIBLE OCD RELATED SYMPTOMS AND ISSUES, SOME ARE RANDOMLY THROWN IN JUST INCASE. IM NOT JUST LOOKING FOR A DIAGNOSIS, IM RANTING FOR MYSELF SO I CAN NOT ONLY MAKE SENSE OF MY PROBLEMS, BUT FEEL BETTER AND GET THINGS OFF MY HEAD.
need to reread . Need to read every word on a page . Unwanted sexual attractions/thoughts. Looking at and “using” weird porn, even if I know I shouldn’t. Incest related thoughts, actions, and dreams. Reminded of guilt seconds after waking up everyday. Feeling the need to read every letter or number in visible sight. Even if it’s ingrained in my brain already. Need to go through with plans, or will be on mind for a long time. Obsessed with people entering room or touching things. Gets to the point where I sniff objects for minutes and get shivers down my spine. Needed to repeat scratches and movements on other side for symmetry. Lots of sequences done with numbers in mind. 4=1-2-3-1 Thoughts not leaving head. Not picking up or making sense of things heard or read, and things just turning into a jumble making me have to go back again, and again, and again, or just having to force myself to not care. Forgetting recent thoughts super fast. Really just not doing much in the day. I’ll realize in my many hours awake past midnight that I really didn’t do much of anything. I think about playing my favorite games and watching my favorite shows, but just never get to it. It’s always something I’ll do “later”. I’ll be going to sleep when I notice that I’ve basically just sat all day. Depression and ruined circadian rhythm. Need to double check things multiple times to the point of stress. Need to remember visual details, matches with double checking. If I miss a word in subtitles or captions, I must rewind, the same with auditorial cues, sounds, and spoken words. Happens in conversation too, making me say “huh” and “what” a lot even if my hearing is fine. Rarely feeling “hungry”. I usually just don’t think about drinking or eating until dinner. Feeling like I’m lying to people around me and myself. Constant guilt over real things and not. Overthinking. Now have to read saying every word in my head, and force myself to not move my muscles to “say” the words. Constantly think about this when reading. Everything having to be setup perfectly. Doing something I enjoy has to be hours or days away from any of these bad experiences, and something as little as hearing a voice or one of these intrusive thoughts makes the experience feel ruined. Time perception completely messed up. Every thing feels like it’s always either a week ago, today, or years past. Recent events will be clouded until I randomly remember and come to realize that it was today. Events of yesterday will be remembered as being multiple days ago, until I see a calendar and start overthinking because it really does “feel” like it was a while ago, even if factually, it’s not possible.
Feeling like I’m making things up.
I want an excuse to feel like I’m better than all of this. Like I said previously, I feel like I’m lying to people. I know no one would be proud of how I am if they knew what happened privately and in my head. Some of these issues are small, and all vary in severity, and some only popped up weeks or months ago, but some are serious. Some are possibly life altering. The constant guilt I’m having makes me feel like I have nothing left to hope for. “Like I even deserve to hope” I think. I feel severely depressed at times. Like the future for me is over because these things I’ve done have ended it all. I’m only fifteen, and I feel as if I don’t want to keep living and trying in a life with these experiences. I want an excuse. Real bad, I want to know for sure that this isn’t who I am. That something else was controlling me and making me act this way. I’m too scared to even think about how I could be wrong. I’ve been getting my hopes up ever since I saw someone on a forum mention I could have OCD because of what I think and act like. That would be my excuse. Everything would be okay if I knew I had it. I mean, it wouldn’t have been me, right? Every time I get hopeful thinking that there’s a chance I could have it, meaning I’m still a good person, my thoughts fight against me pushing me back to where I started. It’s like I’m not commanding my thoughts, and even as I right this I’m telling myself I’m exaggerating, or making things up, or once again, just look for excuses to feel better, and to be honest, I don’t know the answer. I don’t know if everything is just me delving into insanity, even if sort of minor, or. I don’t know. I’m losing my train of thought. I don’t know where I’m going anymore.
I’m just scared, and I feel with this guilt, I don’t even deserve that.
I feel as if I’m too far gone, and things just aren’t worth it. I’m too scared to die, so I’d never hurt myself, but I imagine a new life. One where none of this happened. Where I can enjoy life with my family and friends, and socialize, and I’m not sure, watch my favorite movies and shows without being reminded of painful things I’ve done. Every time I feel happy and like things are heading in the right direction, I’ll get reminded of it. It just doesn’t feel worth it continuing when this is who I am. I’ll keep going, because I’d never want to die, but I wish this just isn’t how things were.
I need this excuse. It would change everything. I need the reassurance, and just someone to tell me that it’s true. Having OCD really would be my answer to all of this. I could resume my life. Get back to things. Every time these thoughts and needs crop up, I could just say “no. I know it’s not me, I know I don’t want to think this. I don’t want to do this.” And that would be the end of the conversation, but currently, there is no end. It’s just constant personal berating and guilt. I hate it right now. I don’t want this, but it seems like there’s nothing else left for me. I’m just stuck in some limbo.
Im making one final comment here. I feel like I’m making these symptoms up. I don’t want to face the truth that I may truly be some freak. All of these “symptoms” are frustrating. Some things make my day to day life annoying, sometimes I’m conscious about things a little too much, but I feel like I’m exaggerating, especially since when I’m talking about this, there’s only about one thing I want reassurance for.
I can’t bring this up to anyone for obvious reasons, so I’ll just have to write it here.
I don’t know when, a year, two, I tried to forget, but for the past few weeks, I’ve been reminded every waking minute. I don’t want to argue over morals or anything, I really want help, and a reason to say it wasn’t actually me that made the decision to do this.
I heard my mom having sex next to my bedroom. It was the first time hearing sex in person, and as a teen who masturbated multiple times a day, I didn’t think twice. I got up to the wall with my ear, recorded the sounds with my phone for “later use”, and masturbated to the noises as they were happening.
I don’t even know for certain if OCD can make someone act like this. This one act is what’s making me want to give up. No one else has this problem. I’m alone here, and I deserve it.
Around this time, my sexual attractions just ran out of control.
Before, I was scared I was pedophile, I had where for around a week, I was attracted to “feral” furry porn, I’ve had sexual dreams about multiple members of my family, during a phase where I was almost prepared to become transgender, I snuck into my mom’s room on multiple occasions, and wore her clothes. Underwear included. I just put them back and acted like nothing happened.
I’ve masturbated to images of my teachers, and even got the point where I was editing the images to add “cum effects”. I tried this on a family member once too.
I don’t want to go into all of this detail, for me and for everyone else, but I need to. I need to admit this somewhere, or somehow. I need someone to talk to, someone to tell me that maybe there’s a way something was making me do it. Maybe it was my mind. Maybe they weren’t my actions. That’s all I need to know. If there’s a chance.
I’m not trying to come off as needy or dramatic, and to some people who read this, I bet you’ll think I’m disgusting. I just don’t know what to do anymore. This isn’t who I thought I was. It’s not who I want to be, but since it’s all in the past, it seems like there’s nothing left to do but to accept it and move on. But, how would I do that? I can’t move on from stuff this serious. This is stuff you take to the grave. I’ll be like this until I die. I don’t want this to be how things turned out.
I want a way where I can be told “You have OCD, you’re mind will sometimes work in ways you don’t want it to. This has happened to people other than you. None of this was your fault.” That’s all I went. After that, I really could forget about all of this.
But I have to say just one more time, I can’t keep going on like how I am. I can’t stand living in a life where this stuff has happened, I can’t stand constantly having it on my conscience. I just want help. I can’t say it enough.
It’s not even like I can be sad over this, for as far as I know, it’s my doing. I can’t handle it. I’ve tried forgetting and burying the past, but I think it’s too late for that. This might just be who I am.
submitted by Beautiful-Horse192 to venting [link] [comments]
2021.12.09 09:45 austinspencer666 White widow for the wake n bake🔥 Whats in your bowl?
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2021.12.09 09:45 AutoNewspaperAdmin [Video] - Parents outraged after Fairfax County library puts explicit books near Bible | FOX
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2021.12.09 09:45 RiiguyHATESHFUNDS Q&A session with RollerCoin Team #1 — Meet the hamsters!
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2021.12.09 09:45 MyOwnPathIn2021 Realized I'm angry/irritable again
The trigger Yesterday, I put up a second note on my mailbox, that "no ads" includes one particular company that seems to ignore that. It's been annoying me for months.
Today, some neighbor had neatly folded the adhesive tape around the edges and placed the note in my mailbox. And I'm furious, plotting my come-back and revenge on anyone and everyone who gets in my way. I can feel whatever hormone is triggering this, rushing through me and eating me alive. But WTF triggered that hormone surge in the first place? A paper in a mailbox. Seriously? My neighbors are generally really nice. I'm sure I broke some unspoken rule, but not informing me of that rule just makes me want to go ballistic on Them.
Some thoughts Then I started wondering if it's about lack of control. When I actually do something to try to improve my life, I get stopped out without explanation? Before doing anything rash, I realize this rush of anger happens once in a while. Something small triggers a big "I hate everyone and never want to be around anyone ever again". Why today? Has this been going on for a while? Is it correlated with something else in my life, like stress or winter depression? What did I do last time it happened? Was it good or bad?
The only thing I know is that I'll be running around with this sick feeling due to hormones I cannot control, and that I really shouldn't be shouting to anyone. At the same time, I can't really confront my neighbors, because every bone in my body hates every single one of Them.
I started writing a journal earlier this year, so next time this happens, at least I'll be able to go back and reflect on the duration and circumstances. Maybe that'll help me calm the F down.
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2021.12.09 09:45 I-Love-Horse-Cock Chad having fun
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2021.12.09 09:45 einndeingamesYt Nobody thought I could save them
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2021.12.09 09:45 viligege Zekrom - 7011 7402 7482
2021.12.09 09:45 Legitimate-Put4756 Could use a second opinion, is the ridge on top lame or over the top in a cool way? Thanks for any thoughts
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